-Cleverquacks
Loving you felt like many things:
Like fresh daisies in the spring,
Like hot cups of tea on early mornings,
Like the school gates opening on the last day of term—freedom.
Like fresh daisies in the spring,
Like hot cups of tea on early mornings,
Like the school gates opening on the last day of term—freedom.
Loving you felt exciting:
Like a long-awaited sequel of your favourite book,
Filled with hopes and great expectations
That we'd be amazing together.
Everyone said we'd be amazing together.
It was written in the stars,
And the oceans whispered it to me with every wave that crashed onto the shore.
Everything led back to you.
Every thought, every rock wedged in the wet sand,
Every comic, every ice cream shop
Reminded me of you;
All awkward waves and sweet smiles.
And I loved you.
I loved you because everyone that knew about us
Made me feel like I had to.
That it was only right.
You were all I could think of,
The months where I gave, and I gave, and I gave.
Something between us shifted; like a bed for two but one side was cold,
And I realised maybe you didn't love me the same.
In the end, loving you felt like
A game of tug-of-war, a lovely one,
Until I found that I—
I was the only one still holding the rope.
okay this one hurts on every level and yet, it heals too. i hated feeling this feeling but knowing that none of the feelings i felt is solely something i have to experience on my own is peaceful in a way. it makes me sad that someone so wise and kind as yourself (from what i have understood from your writing, i'm not a stalker i swear!) had to go through something like this. but thank you for being brave enough to write something so deep and post it up. helps a lot.
ReplyDeleteOmg thank you so much!!! That really means a lot. Hope you're doing okay <33
ReplyDelete